Obsessed

I'm scared of my aunt. She called my dorm on Saturday morning just to check whether I slept there. She called my cellphone while I was in a cab on my way to Paranaque. I refused to answer her.

When I got home to my parent's house, I unmindfully answered the ringing phone.

"Where did you sleep last night?"

I replied, "Not in my dorm."

She demanded that I tell her where I slept. I kept my mouth shut. I told her, "I was hurt by what you said to me, so I don't think I want to talk to you right now."

War.

"Ano ba, binabastos mo ba ako? (Are you being rude to me?) Just answer the question, where did you sleep last night? Talagang kinakalaban mo ba ako? (Do you really want to fight me?) Ang cheap mo. (You're so cheap.) Ang cheap cheap mooooooooo!"* the last word becoming a shrill note.

She began sobbing.

"Bakit mo ba ako ginaganito, Cathy? After everything I've done for you, ito pa ang gagawin mo sa akin. Ang taas ng tingin ko sa iyo. (Why are you doing this to me? After everything I've done for you, this is how you'd repay me? I think so highly of you.) You just gave up your virginity (?) to a guy who is not worth it."*

My grandmother began to tag-team me, warning me of the risks of pregnancy and HIV. "If anything happens to your aunt, if she dies, it's your fault!"

Calmly, I explained that I am an adult and that they need to let go of me. I am not responsible for her life, as she is not responsible for mine. No dice.

She's blaming Thomas for my "attitude change" and is threatening to fly home for a battle royale. I warned Thomas about it.

Frankly, what's my business is my business.I guess I am partly to blame for this, since I led her to the mistaken belief that I am still a virgin, just because I kept mum about my boyfriends to her. My aunt is the sort of person who only hears what she wants to hear, and has now made it her personal mission to make my life a living hell. She calls my dorm incessantly to check whether I slept there. She threatens and pesters my family so I would obey her.

I understand that all she wants is to ensure that I am in good hands, that I am not being used by Thomas. But even so, whatever happens between us is OUR business, not hers. If I am being used, so what? I know she cares for me, but I am not that stupid to not be able to rise after every fall. Nor to jeopardize anything I worked for. Does the fact that Thomas and I share expenses for everything mean that he doesn't respect me? I'm looking for an equal, not a servant. I will not solely date a man because of his ability to take care of me.

She and my mom are begging me to return back to Paranaque. Hell NO! I was miserable when I lived with my parents! Have they forgotten that?

*sigh* Somebody give me an aspirin. Gosh, I never thought that my aunt was this attached to me. Does anybody have an idea of how I can handle this?

"Think Cathy, think, why I am reacting this way?"

Because you love me too much.