"Its Not the Size of the Wave...Its the Motion of the Ocean"

Author's note: This article was written after certain male readers wanted me to tell them what women really say when they think of men. The opinions cited here are my own. This is strictly a clinical and objective article about a very charged subject. WARNING: EXPLICIT LANGUAGE

The penis. This appendage is apparently the source of all joy and insecurity among men. Honestly, as a woman, I don't get this penis-centric mentality. The closest female protrusion that would approximate the feelings men have for their penises are breasts. But when it comes down to the nitty-gritty, breasts aren't really primarily important in the reproductive function. Women can still be attractive without breasts. Just ask breast cancer survivors. Or flat-chested women.

Men are apparently obsessed by it. Whenever conversation with my friends turn into sex, the men in the group will always, always talk about or allude to their little men. Goodness! I guess women aren't really tuned into this whole obsession because most of the time, we just lay there, really. We are at liberty to critique. So probably the onus of giving a wonderful performance in bed falls on men, and when you can't fall back on technique...I guess you focus on size.

From my experiences, whoever coined the phrase "Its' not the size of the wave, but the motion of the ocean" was only half-right. What's the use of great technique when the little man can't get to where he's going? At the opposite end of the spectrum, what's the use of being genetically penile-gifted if you don't know how to use it? If a man isn't willing to listen to women, and unless women actually speak up, a man will never really improve in bed, no matter how many times he's been sexually occupied.

So here are the three things that I feel matter when it comes to the little man.

Length--But of course!
This matters to a certain extent. Whoever said that it doesn't matter is lying to you.
However, too much of a good thing can be bad. I remember one time I had with an ex boyfriend who was a little above-average gifted. However, since he was practically a virgin (I think I was second on his list), his large size made his inadequate performance all the more painful. My sex sprain took three days to heal. Ouch!
So in the right person, size is a good thing. If you ain't that lucky in the genetic lottery, I'm really sorry, because there isn't much that you can do. However, you still have girth working for you.

Girth--As an old Friends episode has revealed, girls talk about girth. I know my sister and I do.
Girth is okay. It does compensate for size a little...but just a little. If your package is a stub, it doesn't really do much, but at least we'll know its in. Again, too much of a good thing is bad. Even if you're good in bed, too much girth will really hurt!
I once had a friend with benefits relationship with someone who has since moved to the US. He wasn't lengthy, but he was a bit thick. We couldn't do certain positions because IT REALLY HURT! Could I emphasize this enough?

Curvature--The little quirks of the human body could be a wonderful thing!
Yes, Virginia, the G-spot does exist. I discovered this fact due to a fortunate accident I had with a lover, who had a package that curiously curved upward. I wasn't very keen on the missionary position, because frankly, it did nothing to rock my world. But with this guy...whoa.The missionary has made me a convert!That was the night that I had my first multiple orgasm. Three times in a row.

These are the three things that matter when it comes to the variables of this part of the male anatomy. If you are a man and inadequate in one of these aspects, don't fret. Hopefully, any guy reading this could try to determine how to best make use of their little quirks to their full advantage.