Trip part 1-Pagsanjan

Thom decided that he needed a breather, away from the city. "I want to go someplace green," he said. So off we went to Laguna, armed with nothing but a guidebook, our wits, and P 7,500 in cash. I wanted to see if I was hardy enough for that sort of thing, since I wanted to go into travel writing, after all.

Backpacking fun.
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I decided that I wanted to go to Caliraya, Laguna. But since the prices of lodgings there were out of our reach, we decided to go to the city next to it: Pagsanjan, Laguna. We set out at 2:14 p.m. from Buendia.

After a 3 hour bus ride, we arrived at the boundary to Pagsanjan, in Sta Cruz, Laguna. Immediately, locals offering us boat rides and lodgings swarmed us like flies. I knew why we were subjected to this harassment: Because Thom was white, and I was Pinay, and thought that we had money (more about this in a later entry). I was already at the point of losing my temper, and began snapping at the people. Thom, being an experienced backpacker said that this was normal, since tourism is their main source of livelihood. I should keep calm, since remaining irritated would do nothing. I decided to heed him and let him go through all the trouble haggling.
------

We set our sights at the Pagsanjan Garden Resort, which the guidebook said had "pretty gardens, a swimming pool, and was right by the lake." Accomodations for a room with a fan started at P 400. We considered this reasonable, and took a tricycle to get there.

We arrived at 5:30 p.m., more than ready to eat and rest after our journey. The gardens lived up to the guidebook. However, We were informed that we could not use the pool, since it was located by the guesthouse, which rents out for P 8,000 a month, and since the guesthouse was occupied, we could not use the pool.

Strike 1.

We looked at the accomodations. The room was depressing. It smelled of stale sex, and was furnished with one single bed, another double-deck bunk bed, and the walls were covered with fake wood panels. The air-conditioned rooms, which cost P 1,200 a night, were of the same depressing quality, with the air-conditioning. We both wanted out but since it was too late to look for another place, we decided that we could withstand the stinky room and spent the night there. We had no private bath, and had to use the public dormitory restroom. Thom argued with the management to give us discounted rates since their rooms were substandard, but management won.

We ate dinner at their restaurant. their prices definitely did not deserve the quality of their service and the food. I noticed that the employees were talking snidely about us behind our backs. I told Thom that it would pay for him to be nicer or to be less argumentative. "I just smile sweetly, bat my eyelashes, and they give me what I want, with something extra."

"No chance of that sweetie. I'm white. They'll never give us anything at the right price."

to be continued



NikkiAlfar
Tobie Abad>
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe

Coming in Pieces

I have been super-busy with all my jobs that sometimes, I can barely make heads or tails of my day. I have to go to my dorm to dress, then go over to Thom's place to live and sleep, wake up at 5 to go to work, then after that cover news for my second job. Thom complains that I work too much. Yes, the demands of a 14-hour workday is not easy.

Not that I'm complaining. I've asked God for this, I got what I wanted. Great jobs, great boyfriend, great food, great sex, and a great apartment. So I guess I can't really complain about the stresses of my less-than perfect work week.

Last Friday night, Thom and I were wakened by a 9 pm phone call. It was a request to work on Saturday to cover an 8 am Department of Trade and Industry meeting to make a press release for Mrs. Boss' daughter, an Undersecretary.

"That is not fair because they should pay you more. It is a weekend..."
And here he goes...the "Germany speech"
"...In Germany, employees can refuse work on a weekend."

But sweetie, we're not in Germany. And my employers, most certainly, are never fair.
------

We had a hectic Saturday ahead of us. We had a massage lesson at our apartment from 8 am to 12 pm from a licensed masseur I found to teach us how to give proper massages (his idea). I signed us up for a photography workshop in the Filipinas Heritage Library in Makati from 2 pm to 6 pm (my idea). This means that all our plans were shot to hell.

So I told Mrs. Boss' secretary that the photo workshop was at 10 am, and will try to make it there during the workshop lunch break. I hoped they would never catch my little white fib. I justified to myself that it was warranted, since they wanted me to work on Saturday on such short notice!

To ensure my presence, they had my mom call me at 8 am the next day to compel my attendance. I told her the same thing. Then I turned my phone off.
------

Mr. Masseur came on time. He was a great teacher, and Thom was a fast learner. Ha! Great massages from here on end for me! .

------

4 hours of massage lessons and an hour of crazy sex and a ___number of orgasms later, I found myself at the DTI meeting with my mind completely blank.

A slow panic was beginning to rise in my brain. I could't think. I knew I should feel alarmed, but strangely, I couldn't get myself to feel alarmed. Quick, quick I had to think, I had to think up of smart questions, I had to think up of

Ms. Undersecretary slowly walked toward me.

Could you come back at 6 pm, she asked? Come back when the meeting is over so you can conduct your interview properly.

Whew.
-----

I came back at 6:30 p.m., complete with my voluntary functions, and stayed until 8:30 pm. Poor Thom had it worse than me. He completely forgot his ATM card's PIN number, and now has to write to his bank in Germany and wait for a month for them to replace his PIN!

Playing House

There are certain advantages to living with your lover.

For one, I wake up next to a blond adonis every day.

I wake up to breakfast.

I live in an P 18,000 studio located at the 24th floor of a condominum four buildings away from my office, smack dab in the middle of Salcedo Village. I make P18,000 a month.

Sex on demand (his or hers, doesn't matter. The rougher and kinkier, the better)

Security, even if it may be false.

And certain disadvantages as well.

I have to contend with the unfamiliar mess

Unfamiliar food

Unfamiliar habits.

Someone who doesn't belive in my religion.

He sleeps with a blanket hog.

And no farting around each other!

I am so tempted to give up my place. The economic advantages are enormous. What's the point of paying the extra P 3,000 rent? However, I am aware that we might not be forever. Promises may fall short, Shit could happen. I need the other flat for my security.

And there are the social implications of living together. Yes, I do care about what other people think of me, especially my mother and my aunt. I have always been the goody-goody, and they were constantly in the dark about my extra-curriculars. They would be mortified out of their Catholic skulls if they discover that we have moved in together. Threats of eternal damnation, constant warnings that he's merely using me for sex. It's not unwarranted, but I'd rather not hear it right now.

I just don't want to hear "I told you so." Not from them.

So I should probably keep my place, just for show.

Another potential problem for me if this doesn't work out is if future *Filipino* dates discover that I had lived with a former boyfriend, I would be a dating pariah. I would constantly run into moralistic or insecure prudes who would turn me down because of it. Oh well, I probably won't be interested in dating those kinds of guys anyway.

Maybe I just need to grow up.



NikkiAlfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe

Kababawan

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage something you've always wanted... though you haven't really thought about it.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Sharing Pays

If I'm ever gonna get more freelance work, I really have to overcome my repulsion of talking about money.

I don't have a problem taking care of my money, but I have a problem talking about it. I feel slightly vulgar in speaking about it, because I feel that people will think I'm money-hungry (?) when I pride myself as someone who doesn't judge people on how much money they have.

Whenever I'm confronted with a situation where people ask me to quote how much money I charge, I cringe and give a mumbling response like, "it depends on your budget," or "well what do you think is fair?"

Last Saturday night, I took Thomas to one of my sideline jobs: doing voice-overs for audio-visual presentations, video games, and cartoons. Thomas was so impressed by my work and said that I'm worth much more than the P 700 pesos they paid me for an hour's worth of work, since the script consisted of five pages of dialogue, and pointed out that the boss was willing to give me P 1000. He said that he knew a guy in Germany, who was an actor in the German translation of Finding Nemo. He never charged less than 150 euros for an hour's work. He warned me that I might end up as the smartest guy in a team being milked by a slightly less-smart but more business-savvy boss for all I'm worth.

He's not the only one who has told me that I keep on undercharging my services. Maybe this boils down to not knowing how much I'm worth, how much I should demand for my services.

I try to be assertive in knowing the freelance rate for my writing or voice-over work but it seems that people never want to share their rates, especially for a noob like me. For this particular episode, I asked one of my voice-over friends (she is a regular voice actress in ABS-CBN) how much I should charge for this particular job. She replied by asking how much dialogue was involved, and who was in-charge of the studio I was dubbing for this time. I gave her my answer, and she never answered back! That just struck me as weird, because we were not in competition! Duh, they hired me already, no use in trying to find this person and usurp the job from me!

I understand that there are some career secrets that deserve secrecy, but this, in my eyes, is definitely not one of those times.

In my experience, it always pays to share what you have and what you know.The mark of true talent is when a person is able to be generous enough to share what they have, because they know there is more where it came from! Selfish people are merely digging a hole for themselves because people will eventually learn that you have no talent and people never want to work with you.

For example, My friend Leslie is now working on a job I passed on because I felt that the job reinforced Filipino colonial mentality (yes, yes, how Über-righteous of me), but since Leslie had no problem with it, she took the job, and is now very happy with her work. How did it pay for me? Well, let's just say that I get invited to very fun parties because of her! (Remember Joey? ;D)

As for Ms. Dubber, I guess its fair to say that I'll won't work with her ever, and will never recommend her to other people from now on, unless circumstance throws us seperately in the same voice job. Lesson for her: Never cut off an opportunity! Lesson for me: I need to learn the monetary value of what I do.



NikkiAlfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe

It!

Damn, I hate memes. But here goes...

7 THINGS THAT SCARE ME
1. The sight of blood
2. The sight of medical procedures
3. Being alone in a dark, spooky place
4. Natural catastrophies
5. Losing my loved ones
6. Being branded as stupid
7. Facing the consequences of 'not being good enough'

7 THINGS I LIKE MOST (in no particular order)

1. Books
2. My bed
3. My TV set
4. My journal
5. My friends
6. Kissing
7. Sex
8. good food

7 IMPORTANT THINGS IN MY ROOM

1. BED
2. TV SET
3. Clothes
4. Shoes
5. My documents
6. My jewelry
7. My books

7 RANDOM FACTS

1. I can be a bitch when I want to.
2. I choose to not be a bitch.
3. I'm actually a friendly person
4. I am not easily distracted when I'm doing something I like
5. I like sex, and I'm not ashamed to admit it
6. Only my parents and family can ever get me to sway my opinion. Oh, except for Thom
7. I hate HATE failure

7 THINGS TO DO BEFORE I DIE

1. Travel the world and consume 30 passports in the process
2. Become a travel journalist
3. Become a respectable journalist, artist, and photographer
4. Live in New York, London, and Tokyo
5. To estalish a reutation of being up for anything
6. To be remembered for my 'vibe,' to be a great spirit
7. To find the love of my life.
8. To learn at least 1 romance language

7 THINGS I CAN DO

1. Cosplay
2. Take semi-decent photos, and write decent articles.
3. I can be a great lay
4. Appear unflustered under pressure
5. Make amazing mashed potatoes, gravy, cookies and 'pinoy carbonara'
6. Be the most doggedly determined person on the planet
7. Trust someone completely.

7 THINGS I CAN'T DO

1. Do something I abhor
2. Like someody I don't like
3. Fake a freindship
4. Force myself to like somebody
5. Kill a person
6. Compromise my principles
7. Believe in myself completely

7 CELEB CRUSHES

Angelina Jolie
Jude Law
Justin Theroux (tama ba?)
ay madami masyado...

TAG YOU!

More than Like

Thomas and I have been officially together for a week now, and we are probably in our "Honyemoon stage" when I find everything he does adorable.

I am officially a convert to dating western men. I am glad that I decided to give the white guy a go. It's so refreshing to be in a relationship where everything is clear-cut and safe. No second-guessing, no gray areas. I know what to expect. I know what I'll get. Filipino men may be maalaga but western guys give it to you straight-up and honest. That is something I definitely like.

I practically live in his flat. He makes me breakfast. An amazing lover and a good cook. What more can a girl ask for?

He digs that I'm smart and that I give great massages.

He tells me he'd be crazy to let me go. I would be crazy if I let him go.

We are so deliriously happy that we are getting paranoid. We're waiting for us to fight, we're waiting for the other shoe to drop. We're so worried that everything moved so fast. But we also believe that since everything happened so organically and so naturally, could there have been any other way?

We're just thinking of today. I do agree in principle that it is best to live for today, but to actually practice it?

He's the wisest guy ever! I kept on stressing out about the future, and he told me a story about the time he and his best friend trekked across the Alps for 21 days, from Germany to Italy. He said that their co-trekkers who stocked up food for 2 months failed to complete the trek; they on the other hand brought only enough for two weeks and bought food from little pitstop villages along the way. It takes a lot for a man to shut up any of my arguments, and he did that very calmly. I'm waiting for the time when his unbelievably logical nature annoys me.

He is so uncompromising in his principles I am bowled over. We went grocery shopping, and he actually refused the plastic bag and placed everything in his big-ass mountaineering backpack. I watched with slight embarassment, amusement, and admiration as he placed an entire salami, jug of water, a stick of butter and assorted cold cuts into his bag. I know that it is common practice in Europe, but if I were in his shoes, I'd do as the Romans!

He stuck to his guns when the owner of his P 18,000 unit refused to pay for the cleaning of his sink's grease trap, which was already clogged when he got there. I would've just shrugged it off as something not worth stressing over, and forked over the P 100. But he does have a point.

Today, he gave me the keys to his flat. He is so unafraid of commitment! He's okay with the fact that my aunt doesn't like him! He's okay with my crappy house and my crappy dorm room! That my parents are worried about my future.

He is so helping me become an adult, and is slowly teaching me to not be bonded to my parents' opinions of my life, and actually shrug off my aunt's attempts to control my life.

He likes that I'm creative and do things my way.

We're not yet at the stage where we are comfortable with saying I love you, but his feelings for me are crystal-clear. He woke up last Sunday morning with a headache. I asked him if it could be because of the beer he drank last night, which he described as "shit." In his limited English, he answered "I think I'm scared. I definitely like you more than like."

Uncut!

(Editor's note: The subject matter is for adults or adult-minded people only. This is a clinical essay on a sexual subject. Salacious comments are NOT WELCOME. Thank you.)

Most Filipino men are circumcised by age 13, so I do not really have friends who have ever expereinced what it is like to be with "The Uncut." Unless you're dating a Muslim, a Filipino, most Americans or a Jew, chances are your man has not undergone "the knife."

There is still a debate among men and parents everywhere on whether to cut or not to cut. I do not have any personal preference, but this is one thing I am sure of: I was shocked when I first saw an uncirumcised penis. Sure, sure: it was what God gave them, au naturele. But I was so unused to the sight that I actually stared at it for almost a full minute, quite unsure on how to use it. It's like handling a Mac after being a life-long PC user: It sure has the same functions, but the layout was weird!

Honestly, there is really no difference with having sex with a man who has not had the surgery with a man who has. However, the handling of the uncircumcised is very different. DO SO WITH CAUTION!

Remember the episode in Sex and the City when Charlotte first experienced sex with an uncircumcised man? Well, it does not look like a Shar-pei (I guess it was that man's quirk) but the willie sure looked like it had its own carrying purse! So instead of the shroom-man, expect to see something in the shape of a missile.

Think of it as a Tootsie Roll: You have to unwrap it to get to the goodies inside. After you get over the sight, demand that your man wash his equipment before use. NO IFS OR BUTS! Even if you have to drag him to the restroom kicking and screaming! Unless you like the taste of smegma. Yum!

Gently unroll the head. Sometimes, it naturally rolls off when it becomes erect, so when that's over with, remember that unlike a circumcised penis YOU CANNOT DO JUST AS YOU PLEASE JUST YET! I usually ask a man to teach me how he likes his desserts, but with an uncircumcised guy, you have to be v-e-r-y gentle. His head down there has not been exposed to the elements, and is therefore more sensitive than average. A stray tooth would send him into a world of pain.

After that it's pretty much the same. So I guess it is at this time you can relax and enjoy the ride. Foreskin is a bit flimsy, so overdoing it could rip the head open and this can cause infection. So if you're doing it bare, don't try too hard.

And no, it does not look bigger.



NikkiAlfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe

Ost-West

I don't really go out with white men. I think they're big, lumbering, and hairy, much like Bigfoot. I don't like hairy men. They scare me. In my limited experience in dating Caucasians, I just don't really feel the vibe, since I am under the impression that they are very condescending toward our culture and people.

So I wasn't really expecting much last Saturday when I had dinner with Thomas, the German. He is 20, an intern for the Konrad Adenauer Foundation. We met during the State of the Nation Address ceremonies.

I was pleasantly surprised when we found out that we had a lot in common. He loves the beach and traveling. He just came from an exchange-student program in Bali, Indonesia (wise, that boy), and showed me his pictures during his stay there. He grew himself a full, shaggy mountain man beard (eww!), and had a laugh over his experiences.

We had dinner at a restaurant in Greenbelt, where we exchanged stories and information about our cultures. It wasn't really that I was attracted to him, more like we felt very at ease with each other.

Throughout the dinner, he talked about his life as a POOR GERMAN STUDENT (think Hideki from Chobits). So when time came to pick up the tab, I voluntarily picked up my wallet to foot my share of the bill. Normally, I wouldn't do this since Filipino women are taught that you should never pick up the tab during dates. However, I wanted to be sensitive to European customs, since he has only been in the Philippines for a week. How would he know about Filipino customs?

He said that he wanted to go somewhere quiet, so we went to my favorite hang-out place in Quezon City, Seventy-7 bar. We talked for a bit more, and he did the whole finger-tracing-palm routine (apparently, this very corny and awkwardly romantic practice trancends culture and races among college boys). It was just then when my phone rang. It was my sister, asking what I was wearing and how the date was going. Of couse, we were speaking in Filipino. I told her that I was in the Mango jumpsuit she picked out for me, and, somewhat sheepishly, admitted that we went dutch during the date. This provoked an outraged "Ano ba yan!" from my sister. I explained to her that this was European custom, and I just wanted to make the dude feel comfortable.

A few minutes after the call, the phone rings. Oh my, my sister told my overprotective aunt, who lives in Las Vegas, about my date! Just then I wanted to kill my pregnant sister. Okay, the big guns are calling. I needed to be calm and get this over quickly.

This is a translated approximation of our conversation.

"Is it true you went dutch?"
"Well, yes. I just wanted to be polite and follow their customs."
"He's in the Philippines!" she exclaimed. "He should be following our customs!"
"But how would he know about our customs? He's barely been here for a week?"
"Well, educate him."
"Tita, he's a poor German student. Like, he receives money from his parents. He doesn't work yet. I just didn't want to impose."
"And why, of all places, would you go to some secluded place in Quezon City? Why go so far?"
"This is not a secluded place! It's right along E Rodriguez! It is not a strange far-away place! Besides, this is my favorite restaurant. I celebrated my 22nd birthday here!"
"Fine. Is he with you."
"He's right beside me."
"All right, we'll talk later."

I had a bad feeling about this.

To Thomas' credit, he did admit that he felt embarassed because while I worked for my money, he still relied from dole-outs from his parents and the German government. Ahh, welfare.

-----

The very next day, my aunt unleashed the furies.

"Why would you allow yourself to go on a date and go dutch! Do you know what that shows? It shows that he doesn't respect you! He has no idea what you're worth!"
"Nooo it does not! I was just following customs! I just didn't want to impose."
"He's the one in the Philippines, he should adjust to our customs."
"Tita, just because we went dutch doesn't mean that he doesn't respect me; I've gone out with Filipino men who paid for everything who turned out to be complete assholes."
"If he really was a decent person, you wouldn't have gone as far as Quezon City!"
In a withering tone, I replied, "Tita! I tell you right now: you won't find any decent men in the world."
"I don't think so. I don't think so."
Exasperated, I snap back, "besides, he's white. We don't really know how he thinks! If he pays for everything, he might expect things from me!"
"No, that's not true. What about Steve? I don't think he expected things from you."

Steve was her former boss, a Bill Clinton look-alike twice my age who treated me to P 11,000 dinners and gave me my Canon EOS SLR camera in a bid to curry my favor. My family was seriously pushing me to marry him, but I said no because it was gross and I felt that he was not trustworthy. I was vindicated a few years later.

"Really Tita? Really? Do you really think Steve expected nothing from me?"

"Oh well, really, next time, if you know the dude has no money, just take him to a cheap place"
"Look, the only reason I took him there because it was quiet. He wanted quiet. You don't find quiet in Makati."
"There has to be other quiet and cheap places in Makati."
"Tita, believe me, all the cheap and quiet places in Makati are beer halls. Otherwise, the quiet places in Makati hawk P 150 beers. That's the cheapest beverage on the list. And you know I don't drink alcohol."

This battle was completely pointless and ended in a draw.

I found comfort with my friends and my mother, who totally saw my point. My mother even gave me a piece of advice. "That's why I never dated Americans when I was single. Once, an American guy courting me brought a box of chocolates to our house. I thought they were for me, but it turned out that it was for him."



Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe

SONA-A day in my Life

What I like about being part of the entire State of the Nation Address ceremonies is the feeling of being invited to the year's most exclusive party. Granted, I'm working the entire time, but being in the same room with the President, dis-"honorables" and people from all over the country? I'm basically rubbing elbows with people from diverse professions, ages, and socio-economic backgrounds.

I feel privileged to be part of the staff every year. It stirs my sense of patriotism and hope that maybe, things will be different. To be part of something that makes the country work (though many of us are frustrated because things seem to be going otherwise) is something that completely blows my mind.

This is the first SONA I've worked as a photographer. I was an usher in the past years, before I asked for this assignment.

Anyway, here's the SONA through my eyes.



The media setting their gear up for the big event



Menial task of the day: I was with Mrs. Boss in her car. We were cruising through EDSA when my mistress had a hankering for bananas. I ran across Guadalupe Market, in heels, looking for a bunch.



With Miko's Nikon F4, attached with a 300 mm lens. Damn that bitch has a fat ass! I had to lug that four pounder all day. Playing with the boys in the photographer's gallery. No flash, bawal sa proceedings eh.



Hello, Ramos?



Mindanao lawmakers applaud the parliamentary/federal government proposals.



The "pala" boys. Look at them generals! Uniforms!!!!



You have to love the free food.



Thomas, A German intern working for the Konrad Adenauer Foundation. Saturday's bound to get interestin ;)

SONA Fashion

Always interesting



Somebody's gotta tell him that Tony Ferrer is the original "da man."



A Manobo mother-daughter tandem. Gotta love the outfits!



Wonder what he's saying?



Don't hate her cos she's president.

WARNING! Men in Uniform Right Ahead!

Ahhh, the annual State of the Nation Address. I love going to the SONA. It's like Sailor Week in New York! Nothing makes my insides tingle like seeing all those men in uniform! Navy, Marine, Bugle Corps, SWAT...MEN IN UNIFORM ARE HOT!

Yes, I do have a thing for men in uniform. In fact, one of my sexual fantasies involve a man, in uniform, and the movie "An Officer and A Gentleman." Whether they're cassocks, school uniforms, and especially military uniforms, there's something to be said how a men, especially a military man, looks in dress whites.

Even if a man is bald, ugly, and has the biggest beer belly in the planet, donning a uniform makes him instantly one hundred times more appealing. It's as if he stands up straighter, his chin becomes more chisled, and turns god-like in awe-inspiring power.

My hercules, my warrior has come home to claim me. I Tarzan, You Jane.

Yes, I'm a brainless brute.

So this year, I decided to take shots of all those cute men in uniform. Ready girls?



Left: Philippine Army Capt. Adelio Abrugena. Married with three children. Likes to run in marathons.
Right: Philippine Army Capt. Jesse Montoya. Has a dimple in his left cheeck. Very shy.



Capt. Ivan Papera of the Philippine Marines. He likes to play basketball.



Philippine Navy Lieutenant Christopher Salimbangon. Married. Likes to ride motorcycles, practice target shooting with his guns, and to play golf.



I'm with P02 Edmundo Nabor, one of The Boss' security men. He has a crush on me, but what he doesn't know is that I have a crush on him, too! He's 23, and topped the police examinations in Baguio when he joined the force. However, he's reluctant to ask me out because he's afraid of my mom, aka The Boss' secretary (wuss!). It makes going to work a little more bearable.


Lt. RR Abendan is one of The Boss' aides-de-camp. He's from the Philippine Navy and has a beautiful and buxom girlfriend, also named Catherine, who's still in school (ha!)



Sgt. Glen Galvatorres of the K-9 Special Reaction Unit. He likes his dog.

There you have it, folks! Hope you enjoy looking at the men as much as I did! Hail the uniform!



Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe

The Story of My Life

Feeling a bit dramatic today...

It's all in the Name

I have a penchant for dating oddly named men. How many girls you know have dated a Kweku, an Irran, and a Mervyl? Maybe it's not the name. More likely I have a penchant for picking guys with commitment issues.

Maybe the reason why I end up with guys with interesting names is because the names become a self-fulfilling monicker; they end up being unique because of their unique names. And I do have to admit, it takes a lot to keep me interested in one guy.

Sometimes, I do wish I could pick out an ordinary guy. Somebody named Joey (oh wait, I did date a Joey), or Mark (hm, I've dated a Mark, too) or a Patrick (no offense to Sephie :D).

For some reason, I am convinced that I will have a son (please remain as optimistic as I am, people!). I want to name my son Jacob, aka Jake. A Jake sounds like a man, a manly man, man's man name. "Hey Jake, wanna play ball?" "Hey Jake toss me a beer!"

See what I mean?

For my future daughter, I'm partial to Dru. It does seem lame to name my daughter after a vampire on Buffy, the Vampire Slayer, but Dru seems like a hip name. She sounds like she's a tough, no-nonsense chick who can be one of the guys. It's not too feminine, but you know that she's drying her nails while she's kicking some loser's ass.
-------

I wanna speak out on the Jude Law thing. Not to excuse his infidelity, but if I were the nanny, how on earth could I refuse Jude Law? The most beautiful man on earth wants to be my sperm donor! He's hot, he's talented. He may not have morals, but that can be worked on. How can I refuse those genes?

All I'm saying is, I can't blame the nanny.

Sienna Miller is gorgeous, and can get herself another gorgeous man. It takes a beautiful person to have the self-esteem to be able to refuse another beautiful person. Way to go Sienna!

Since Jude is now single, he can make a deposit in my bank. Anytime. ;)
----

I stress, however, that this invitation is open to Jude Law and Jude Law alone. Not to you, Mr. Star Wars poseur. Whatever you heard about me is completely wrong.

"Cath, wasup, **** here, no one will ever know naman, eh, cmon just for once"

Does this line ACTUALLY work on women? Stupid!

No one will ever know? Yeah, right. You'll probably tell people that I've spread myself open, even without the benefit of the actual event.

To the man of the everchanging phone numbers (yes, you know who you are).

Screw you.

Man, I feel like a Woman!

For the first time in my entire life, I actually do feel an "adult-ness" that is entirely new and wonderous.

Of course, as soon as I say this, something will happen that will take me down a peg, and put me back on square one.

I like the person I am becoming. I like the person I have become. I do annoy myself a lot, which is not a good thing.

I feel that I now have more patience for other people (as patient as I can get--i still am a very impatient person), for where they are and what they are and why they are.

I like my body. I like how I look. I am very satisfied with it.

Gosh, I cannot believe how afflicted my self-esteem was in my early youth! How I wanted to be other people so badly!

Now, I'm just glad to be myself.

-----

The Girls are a group of friends, former acquaintances who have somehow, banded together and share innermost questions women share with their girlfriends. Of course, I've had good girl friends before, but this is the first time that I have a group of girlfriends whom I shop with and talk about everything-- uncensored!

Leslie is two years younger, and is about as experienced with men as I am. A certified shoe-aholic and shop-aholic, she is tickled that she finally has a "Sex In the City" bunch to call her own. She is the first girl in the posse I became close to. She likes to call herself the "Carrie" of the group.

Jewel is a lot like Miranda. A really tough chick. Bisexual, but is currently dating a guy. We were acquaintances before because of cosplay, but we only became close because of Leslie, her former high school classmate. She was a member of her high school basketball and soccer team, and nothing pisses her off more than men who stare at her very ample bosoms. Caution: She packs a mighty right hook. And how!

K is the youngest, also a cosplayer. Really smart, she's taking up an aeronautics something course in London (yes, England!). She's a bit heartbroken now because she broke her vow to give up her virginity to the man she'll marry, since the current Japanese dude she's seeing is apparently not the one (quite a shocker!)

I am of course the oldest and guess what role I just assumed? Of course, I just HAD to be in PR, just like Samantha!



Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe

A Week in Narcoleptic Hell

I now realize why I was a klutz with bad skin as a teen--it was because was constantly sleep-deprived at the time! It wasn't because I didn't want to sleep. It was because I couldn't. I was constantly reading, daydreaming, watching tv,burning telephone lines, passionately into the Band of the Moment or crushing/swooning to realize that it was already 2 am on a school night.

Cathy now knows that she needs her sleep. Yes, sleep is indeed my friend.

The rumor was only the start of a week where technology and my mind seemed to work against me. It has been a very busy week, adjusting to my new routine, of being up late at night to submit stories on time to my editors in the US, then waking up at 5 to get to work for the Boss.

This Monday, on the way to the gym, my foot fell into a gap between the metal grating that covered a deep gutter in Pasay Road. I had not realized that some bufoon had sawed off a key in the grill, creating a hole big enough to accommodate my foot. Poor me has a dark, dark bruise near my elbow and my left knee. Had I not been holding on the jeep I was going to board, I would have dislocated my hip.

Tuesday,Wednesday, and Thursday was a blur, and I had literally traversed all of Manila in those two days. Days seemed to blend into each other, and I recall feeling the same light-headedness I felt the time I stayed up for THREE STRAIGHT DAYS to finish my thesis. Though I don't drink coffee, it had sustained me through that entire time.

I was supposed to meet my sister on Friday afternoon for an afternoon of shopping fun. I was on my way to deposit cash into my BPI Family Bank ATM using their Express Deposit Machine in their Park Square 1 branch when the machine not only ate my card, it also ate my P 1000 deposit! An hour of consternation later, I was told that I could only retrieve my card on Monday, but they would have to verify whether I did deposit money into my account. If verified, they would only credit it to my account on Friday!

Saturday afternoon through early Sunday morning devoted to a night out with the girls. After spending hours at the Starbucks near the Robinsons Galleria theaters, we decided to take the party to Libis. It was in Libis where I realized that I had left my wallet at Starbucks! I literally felt my knees buckle as I mentally ticked off what important documents I had in my wallet. It was at this time that I felt grateful that the machine ate my ATM. I called every person I could think of who lived in the Pasig/Mandaluyong area to plead, if they can go to Rob Gale and ask the Starbucks staff if they had found my wallet. My friends were either asleep or out of the house. (Me: DUH! of course, it's a Saturday night!) After ascertaining that only my debit card was in danger, I called the card company to have it cut.

Thank you, thank you honest Starbucks employees for keeping the wallet and giving it back when I returned the next day! Oh joy! My card was still cut, but at least I have it back, and I knew that my money was safe.

A lesson learned: I need my eight hours.

A Neil Gaiman Fangurl Moment

LOLZ!

Taken by my camera. Captured by Sephiroth.

Sex, Lies, and Voyeurism

I just heard the most fantastic, the most outrageous rumor about myself last Saturday night that I just had to correct this aspersion! It beats the rumor I heard in college about my friend Don King (he's Chinese, don't ask) hiring two hookers as a gift to himself on his 20th birthday!

The rumor goes like this: I was reportedly in a drinking session with several members of the anime community when I had sex with my 18-year old ex-lover, while he was wearing a borrowed Ragnarok Priestess costume, while anime community staple Vincent Ternida was watching!

Okay, okay, first things first: I DID have sex with the 18 year old in question.
While I am not adverse to a little role-playing, I'VE NEVER had sex in costume...yet.
I DID NOT ever join a drinking spree with the anime peeps. Please! I did with some J-rockers, but that's that.
I WAS NOT ever in a drinking spree with Vincent Ternida.
I MOST CERTAINLY did not have sex in front of him!

As far as I know, the only sentient beings that have seen me do the deed were 1) an ex-member of a j-rock band who was pretending to be asleep.
2) a cat.

I also heard that I am now being referred to as "the slut of the anime community" na "pumapatol kung kani-kanino" (to my non-Pinoy readers, that means: who sleeps with anyone who would have her). I know the people who have said this about me, and I am saddened that they have pre-judged me so.

What makes me a slut? The fact that I had a blabbermouth of an ex-boyfriend who revealed everything about our time together as a bet in a card game? The barely-legal nookie I had with an 18 year old bishonen? You can ask HIM. He started the affair! Okay, I may have exercised poor judgment at the time by agreeing to it. But you know the thing about mistakes? You learn from them. I did. I'm sorry. I got my just desserts. Get off your high horses, people!

While I do relish my reputation as a vixen, the sad truth is, I've probably had my heart broken more times than I've broken hearts. Nice piece of fiction, folks, but get your facts straight.

Somewhere in this city, a very bad 18-year old boy is in need of a good spanking!

Make-up 101: Lips

Oh my, the end of the tutorial. How time fles *sigh*

Might as well move on to the integral part of the series: Lips!

Girls already know the basics, right?

Step 1: Line the lips with lipliner in a shade similar to lipstick

Step 2: Fill in the lips with lipstick. I don't use lip brushes though it does provide more control. I'm just lazy that way. Again!



Step 3: Apply silicon-based lip gloss for shine.



But wait! I have a tip!

The point of the whole lip thing is to emphasize the fullness of the lip. I read somewhere that men associate full lips with fertility (not sure with that!), reason why geishas, flappers and Bett Boop apply lip color to only the fullest part of the lip.

ONe of my make-up pet peeves is the greasy feeling I get after applying lip gloss. Since the aim of lip gloss is to catch light and emphasize the middle of the lip, try applying lip gloss only on the middle part of the upper and lower lip. Avoid the icky just-ate-a-greasy-plateful-of lechon feeling without skimping on the beauty!



So there! I hope you guys picked up a thing or two (or maybe I should learn a bit more) about applying make-up for daily use. Til the next tutorial! Ta-ta AND mwah!

XOXO



Nikki Alfar
Tobie Abad
Gabby Lee
Andre Mischa Cleofe

New Life

After arguing with the fates, pleading to God for years, and whining to my friends, I'm finally getting my ducks lined up in a row, standing firm at my place in the sun, and getting my life in order. Finally!

I started out in my new job last July 1. No, I haven't resigned from Mr and Mrs. Boss. I got me a new job as a features (but sometimes news) writer/photographer for Asian Journal, a newspaper in LA, San Francisco and Las Vegas (yes, in the United States) that caters to the Fil-Am market. My aunt, who reads the paper, congratulated me for my new second job, and I'm just relieved that I feel that I am getting the life I've always wanted, that things are working out my way. It's a nice feeling, of being settled, of knowing where I'm headed. Of knowing that life is on my side. To not feel anxious about the future and of my capabilities.

That I don't have to keep raging, struggling and fighting for what I want. To finally have it *just like that*

I guess if things are meant to be, then they happen *just like that*

My new job entails travel around the Philippines (yay!) covering and writing news (not so yay) and writing feature articles of things that catch my fancy (major yay!)

Last Thursday, I had my first photo assignment! My hands trembled as Miko, my Philippine boss, handed me his verrry expensive Nikon D70. With excitement and trepidation, I took photos of the new Greenbelt malls, anxious to get my shots all right. I learned a lot of new things that day. I've never handled a D 70 before, and Miko kept complaining that his camera's auto-focus capabilites were already shot after only a year of use. I made a mental note not to buy a Nikon. It took me some time to get the hang of the camera, so some of my pictures were out of focus or too dark. I feel that for an amateur, I did well.

I still can't believe that I'm being paid to take photos! I'm not as good as I want to be, but I am determined that I do well in my new job.

My checklist

Live alone-check
Be healthy and physically fit-check
Emotional and mental stability, overall positive disposition-check. No more drama, I hope!
Job I love-check
Man in life-ergh, not at the moment. I need to prove to myself first that I can make it in the Big, Wide World.

Food for Thought

Walang kwenta ang Pilipinas
By: jawbreaker. (isang ordinaryong office worker na ayaw na magbayad ng tax...ever!)

Hindi ko na mapigilan ang sarili ko. Sukang-suka na ko sa mga nangyayari sa bansang 'to! Walang katapusang corruption, walang kamatayang pangbabatikos, pagbabatuhan ng tae at pagpapa-taasan ng ihi ng mga pulitiko sa bawat isa, walang tigil na imbestigasyon ng kung ano-anong isyu pero wala namang matinong resolusyon, walang puknat na pag-aagawan ng kapangyarihan sa pagitan ng mga partido, patuloy na pagdami ng tamad at tangang Pilipino, patuloy na pakikipaglaban ng ideolohiyang wala namang silbi. Ang gobyerno ng Pilipinas, talo pa ang septic tank na hinihigop ng Malabanan - saksakan ng dumi at napakabaho. Kaya hindi nakakapagtaka na ang Pilipinas ang isa sa pinakamahirap at corrupt na bansa sa mundo. Kasi lahat sila bulok, lahat sila walang kwenta. Lahat sila sugapa sa kapangyarihan at sa pera.

ANAK NG TETENG! !$#%Q!&!* @!!!!!

KAHIT KRISTIYANO AKO, HINDI KO MAPIGILANG MAGMURA AT HILINGIN SA DIYOS (MINSAN NGA PATI SA DEMONYO) NA MAMATAY NA SILANG LAHAT AT I- BBQ SILA NG HABANG-BUHAY SA IMPIERNO. SINONG "SILA"? EH DI MGA CORRUPT NA GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS AND WORKERS, MGA TAMBAY NA PILIPINO NA ANG LALAKI NG KATAWAN PERO HINDI NAMAN NAGTRATRABAHO AT HINDI NAGBABAYAD NG TAX, MGA MAYAYAMAN AT ARISTANG TAX EVADERS, PATI MGA AKTIBISTA, NPA AT IBA PANG IDEOLOGICAL GROUPS NA HINDI NAGBABAYAD NG TAX PERO PANG-GULO!!! MAMATAY NA KAYO!!!

Lagi na lang sinasabi ng mga pulitiko: Ipaglaban ang masa! Tulungan ang masa! Mahalin ang masa!

PUNYETA! MASA LANG BA ANG TAO SA PILIPINAS? SINO BA TALAGA ANG BUMUBUHAY SA PUNYETANG BANSANG TO? SAAN BA GALING ANG PANGPAGAWA NG MGA TULAY AT KALYE? SAAN BA GALING ANG PORK BARREL? SAAN BA GALING ANG PERANG KINUKURAKOT NYO? KAMI NA MGA MANGGAGAWA AT MIDDLE CLASS NA BAGO PA MAKUHA ANG SWELDO BAWAS NA - KAMI ANG BUMUBUHAY SA WALANG KWENTANG BANSA NA 'TO!!!!!!!!! BAKIT YANG BANG MGA MASANG YAN NA LAGI NA LANG SENTRO NG PLATAPORMA NG MGA PULITIKO EH NAGBABAYAD BA NG TAX???!!!! F**K YOU! KAHIT ISA SA MGA NAG-RA-RALLYING MGA SQUATTER NA YAN, KAHIT SINGKO HINDI NAG-RE-REMIT YAN SA BIR! PERO PINAPAKINGGAN BA KAMI NG GOBYERNO? LAGI NA LANG OPINYON NG MASA ANG INIINTINDI NG GOBYERNO. KUNG SINO ANG NAG-RA-RALLY, SA EDSA, SILA ANG NASUSUNOD. KUNG SINO ANG MAS MALAKAS SUMIGAW PERO WALA NAMANG ECONOMIC CONTRIBUTION, SILA LAGI ANG FOCUS PAG MAY PROBLEMA. SILA LAGI ANG BIDA. KAMING MGA ORDINARYONG OFFICE WORKERS, OFW'S, LABORERS AT IBA PANG NAG-TRA-TRABAHO AT NAGBABAYAD NG TAX - KAMI ANG NAGPAPAKAHIRAP PARA BUHAYIN ANG PILIPINAS. KAMI ANG MGA TUNAY NA BAYANI NG BANSA!!!

Tuwing nakikita ko ang payslip ko, nag-iinit ang ulo ko at gusto kong maiyak sa inis. Napakalaki ng tax na binabawas sa akin pero ginagamit lang sa walang kwentang bagay ang perang pinaghirapan ko. Lahat ng pagtitipid ginagawa ko para suportahan ang sarili ko, pamilya ko at ang punyetang bansang to. Ni hindi ako makabili ng chicken and spaghetti meal sa Jollibee kahit gutom na gutom na ko. Nag-tya-tyaga ako sa waffle na tig-P10, o kaya pag may konting pera, junior bola-bola siopao sa Mini-Stop sa halangang P20. Eh kung yung pera ko na pinapangbabayad sa tax sa kin na lang napunta, eh di sana nakakapanood pa ko ng sine at least 2 beses sa isang buwan. Nakabili na sana ako ng bagong rubber shoes. Nakapagpagawa na sana ako ng sarili kong bahay. Yung tax na binabayad ko, karamihan nun derecho sa bulsa ng mga corrupt na mga government officials at workers. Habang hirap na hirap akong i-budget ang pera ko, sila naman nagpapakasarap sa mga mansyon. SUV's at luxury cars pa ang dina-d rive nila, samantalang ako sa pedicab lang sumasakay!

P****** INA! PERA KO YANG PINAPAGPAPASASAAN NYO!!!!! Yung tax na binabayad ko, pinapangsuporta sa mga mahihirap. Saan ba galing ang pera pangpagawa ng housing at pagtulong sa mga mahihirap, di ba sa mga manggagawa na nagbabayad ng buwis! Pero karamihan ng mahihirap, kung umasta kala mo inaapi sila ng sobra.

SA TOTOO LANG NO, KAYA ANG MGA MAHIHIRAP LALONG NAGHIHIRAP KASI MGA TAMAD! Ang daming mga tambay sa kalye na walang trabaho pero ang laki ng katawan. Eh kung sila ba nagkargador sa pier eh di sana may pera sila.

TAPOS WALA NA NGANG PERA, ANAK PA NG ANAK! PUNYETA! LALO NYO LANG PINAPADAMI ANG TAMAD AT TANGA SA MUNDO!!!!! Naaawa ako sa mga batang pakalat-kalat sa kalye at namamalimos. Imbes na nag-aaral, dumadagdag lang sila sa bilang ng mga future criminals sa Pinas. Hindi ako magtataka na yung batang nakita kong namamalimos sa Cubao, pagkatapos ng ilang taon cellphone snatcher na.

YUNG MGA MAGULANG NAMAN DYAN, COMMON SENSE LANG! HIRAP NA HIRAP NA NGA KAYO SA BUHAY, MANGDADAMAY PA KAYO NG IBA?! PAPARAMIHAN NYO PA LAHI NYO!

Palibhasa walang mga trabaho at walang pinagkaka-abalahan, kaya nagkakalabitan at nagsusundutan na lang maghapon, magdamag. Sa totoo lang, nakakabilib. Kasi kahit sa ilalim ng tulay o sa kariton lang, nakakabuo pa rin ng bata! Ibig sabihin, maabilidad ang mga Pinoy. Kung gugustuhin, gagawan ng paraan. Kahit sa makipot, mabaho at maduming lugar - SOLVE! Isa pang mga grupo ng tao na nakakainis, yung mga aktibista, NPA at kung ano-ano pang ideological political groups. Sabi nila, mahal na mahal nila ang Pilipinas kaya pinagpalalaban nila ang kanilang mga adhikain.

PUNYETA! EH HINDI RIN KAYO NAGBABAYAD NG TAX! ANG KAKAPAL RIN NG MGA MUKHA NYO! MGA IPOKRITO! MAHAL DAW ANG PILIPINAS AYAW NAMAN MAGBAYAD NG BUWIS! BAKIT MAY BIR COLLECTOR BA SA GITNA NG MENDIOLA AT EDSA?! MAY TAX COLLECTION BA SA BUNDOK?! WALA DIN NAMAN KAYONG MGA TRABAHO! KUNG MAY TRABAHO TALAGA KAYO, HINDI KAYO MAG-RA-RALLY DAHIL SAYANG ANG SWELDO NYO PAG ABSENT KAYO! PAANO NYO MAIPAPAKITA ANG PAGMAMAHAL NYO SA PILIPINAS KUNG WALA NA KAYONG GAWANG MATINO KUNDI MAG-RALLY AT MAMUNDOK??!!! ISA PA YANG MGA MAYAYAMAN AT MGA ARTISTA, NA NANGDADAYA AT HINDI NAGBABAYAD NG BUWIS. ANG KAKAPAL NG MUKHA NYO! ANG DAMI NYO NA NGANG PERA NANGDADAYA PA KAYO SA TAX!!!! HINDI NYO NAMAN MADADALA SA IMPIERNO YANG MGA KAYAMAN NYO. MASUSUNOG LANG DUN YAN. KAYA LALONG BUMABAGSAK ANG NEGOSYO DITO SA PILIPINAS, KASI MGA NEGOSYANTE MANDARAYA. PATI SHOWBIZ INDUSTRY, BAGSAK NA DIN. KARMA ANG TAWAG DYAN. MGA BALASUBAS KASI.

Sana magkaron ng POLITICAL AND NATIONAL CLEANSING.

- Alisin (mas maganda kung patayin na lang) ang lahat ng pulitiko at political families sa puwesto
- Tibagin ang lahat ng mapanirang organizations at grupo.
- Itapon sa malayong isla o kaya i-pwersa ng hard labor ang mga sobrang tamad na mga Pilipino.
- Ihiwalay ang mga bata sa kanilang mga tamad at tangang magulang
upang makapag-aral sila at maturuan na maging mabuting tao at mamamayan.
- Magkaron ng bagong lider na walang political ties at utang na loob sa kahit sino.
At higit sa lahat, dapat tax payers lang ang pwedeng bumoto!

Kung kinakailangang magka-giyera para magtino ang mga Pilipino, ayos lang. Masyado na kasing matigas ang ulo ng mga tao dito. Gusto ng kalayaan, pero hindi naman handang panagutan ang responsibilidad ng pagiging malaya. Meron daw pinaglalaban na prinsipyo at adhikain pero takot namang mamatay para dito. (Sa mga nakaka-alam sa anime na Gundam Wing, yan ang inspirasyon ko sa new Pinas hehe. I love you Zechs! I love you Treize!)

Hangga't hindi nagkakaron ng radical change, patuloy na walang kwenta ang Pilipinas at patuloy na magiging tanga ang majority ng mga Pilipino. Sa dami ng nag-mi-migrate na Pilipino sa ibang bansa, dadating ang panahon na minority na lang ng population sa Pilipinas ang may utak. Yung mga magagaling na Pilipino, malamang maubos na. Sobra na kasi silang na-fru-frustrate at na-de-depress sa mga nakikita nila. Ilang taon pa at aalis na rin ako sa Pilipinas. Wala kong balak na magkaron ng pamilya sa isang bansa na hindi pinapahalagahan ang kontribusyon ng mga taong tunay na bumubuhay dito. Kawawa naman ang magiging anak ko kung dito sya mabubuhay. Sa totoo lang, broken hearted ako. Minahal ko din ang bansang ito. Pilit kong pinagtatanggol kahit bulok. Nakarating na ko ng ibang bansa, pero pinili kong bumalik. Pero ngayon, ayoko na. Suko na ko. Sayang lang ako sa bansang to. Simple lang naman ang hiling ko. Gusto ko lang mabuhay ng tahimik at maayos. Gusto ko na kahit paano eh maipa gmalaki ang Pilipinas. Pero wala eh. Doomed to be jologs ang bansang to.

Alam ko marami pa ang umaasa at naniniwala sa pagbabago. Good luck and God bless! Sana tama kayo at mali ako.